Having spent a mammoth amount of time, effort, and hard-earned cash on designing and planning your wedding you might think that you have managed to create the perfect wedding. However, all too often it’s the “the little things” you need to be aware of – the tiny unforeseen elements that have the power to embarrass or offend unintentionally!
Here we list 5 common wedding planning faux pas. There will be more to come in later posts!
Failing to Include the Wedding Location in the Save The Date Card
There is no getting away from the fact that weddings are expensive things. Nowadays, people are willing to travel across the globe to see friends or family ‘tie the knot’. You therefore need to be particularly considerate of your guest’s needs and requirements, especially during holiday periods when accommodation and flights book up early and discounted rates disappear.
So when sending out your Save The Date cards make sure you let your guests know what town or city the wedding is taking place in. They will then have plenty of time to get organised and avail themselves of early bird rates for flights and hotels. Failure to do so during peak season, might mean that some guests are unable to attend.
Not Putting the Correct Postage on your Invitations
Shocking but oh-so-true! Imagine the scenario: all your bespoke, hand made wedding invitations – that have taken weeks to source, style, word, proof and sign off – have been sent out with inadequate postage stamps…
So instead of a beautiful wedding invitation your guests receive a post card from Royal Mail simply stating that an item is awaiting collection from the local sorting office. And for which your guests will then have to travel to, queue for 15 minutes and then pay £1.00+ for the pleasure!
Just get it weighed and save yourself a whole lot of bother.
Opting for an Inconvenient Day on Which to Get Married
Due to the cost of a modern wedding more and more couples are opting to get married on a Friday or Sunday in order to benefit from lower off-peak rates offered by venues and suppliers. However both days have their drawbacks.
By choosing a Friday wedding date you are simply asking your guests to take a day of work, either as a holiday or lost pay. Not only is it a considerable complication to pass onto your guests, it also adds to the ever increasing cost of attending a modern wedding – travel, hotel, gift, new attire, accessories, hair etc etc.
And naturally the situation is made worse for those with children who will need to be excused from school.
Sunday has fewer complications however with work the next day, don’t expect your guests to want to ‘party’ as they might do if the wedding was on a Saturday.
Including Plus Ones
This is a potential minefield. Firstly never simply include the words +1 on an invitation – it’s impolite, impersonal and implies you haven’t had the courtesy to find out who your friend or relative is in a relationship with. Always find out the full names of the people you are inviting to your wedding!
Secondly, you must establish a transparent cut-off line for the guest list, convey this policy to your guests and then stick to it. Any deviation or exception to the rule – such as allowing one guest to bring their boyfriend of 9 months when you refused another friend who had been in a relationship for 11 months – will only foster resentment and bad feelings on the wedding day.
If your friends or relatives are in long term relationships or engaged but you have not yet met the person they are engaged to, proper etiquette suggests you should really invite them to your wedding.
However if the guest is in a relatively new relationship there is no need to extend an invitation to their new boy/girlfriend.
The only exception to this might be made boy/girlfriends of immediate family members or members of the wedding party who are likely to have put a lot of effort into your wedding and might reasonably be permitted to bring a guest you are not yet familiar with.
Cutting Back on Wedding Party Gifts
As we have seen, weddings are expensive events for all concerned. In fact in a survey earlier this year it was estimated that it cost in the region of £450.00 for a member of the wedding party to attend a wedding (don’t forget hen/stag costs!). Although guests might be able to get away with not having to buy a brand new outfit, members of your wedding party will often have to buy an expensive new dress or suit as well as accessories, specifically for the event and in line with your particular requirements!
Do not therefore skimp on gifts for chief bridesmaid, best man, bridesmaids and ushers – budget at least £50.00 per person. And don’t forget a similar spend on the thank you gifts for your parents. In the grand scheme of things this is a tiny amount to spend when compared to your entire wedding budget. And the members of your wedding party are likely to be deeply touched by your thoughtful generosity!